Archive | March, 2014

Love doesn’t hurt

31 Mar

I just read a  Facebook post that says it isn’t true that love hurts.  What hurts is rejection, loss, loneliness and envy.   The post said that everyone gets these things confused with love.  But in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all the pain and makes someone feel wonderful again.

This is so true. And we all need love so much!  I started to write a comment, then decided to put my comment on this blog.

We all feel painful emotions at times.  That’s just a part of life.   It’s wonderful when we have special someones that love us and make us feel better.  But what about those of us living alone, without someone special.  We need love too.

Sometimes I get to wondering why I’m even around, do I really make a difference in anyone’s life?  Then I’m reminded that I don’t always have to be on the receiving end of love.  I can be the one to give it.

Thinking about this, I realized that it really doesn’t have to be someone special that I love or show love to. I can extend that marvelous emotion with everyone. Love, in its simplest form, is just caring about someone.

Take the woman I met in the mall parking lot the other day.  She had long brown hair, extending past her waist.  After smiling and saying Hi, I told her how much I liked her hair.  She said “Well, thanks.  I really need someone to like something about me today.”    We spoke a few minutes.  I told her about the French Twist hairstyle my daughter and I had recently seen.  Then we parted, each going our separate ways.

I don’t know who that woman was and I’ll probably never see her again.  I don’t know what problems she is facing, or why she needed encouragement. The only thing I know, is that I’m glad I reached out to her.  Such a little thing, maybe 3 minutes.  Yet, I think it lightened her load.   Maybe her day became better, at least for a few moments.

It also did something to me.  I’ve been thinking of her often since that day.  I’ve prayed for her, asking for help for her to face the things she is going through.  This has brought me out of myself.  It has made me aware that I shouldn’t be waiting for someone to love me–I should be loving others.

Because it’s true.  Love doesn’t hurt.  Love heals.  Care heals.  Just the smallest concern for someone helps.  And love is a two-way street.  Every time I reach out to someone, something comes back to me.  (This can happen in a bad way, too.)  So I want to be careful that I’m reaching out to others with care, concern, interest and love.

This is easier to extend to some people, than to others.  Some just seem to rub us the wrong way.  Maybe the best way I can love those is to stay away from them, and pray for help–not just for them (cause, after all they are the one that needs help, right?)–but for myself  to understand how to love them.  As I think of that, I believe love needs to start at the basic bottom level.

If I can have a concern–a desire for the well being–of those who I really don’t care for, then that is the start of love.  If I truly feel that I don’t want them to be lonely, rejected, and suffer loss–then I am on my way to loving them.  As the Bible says–Love works no ill to our neighbor.

Does this mean that I’m going to strike up a conversation with everyone I see?  Of course not.  I don’t even have eye contact with some people.  With some I may share a smile, or extend a short greeting.

But sometimes, I will reach out with a brief comment.  And for a few moments I may connect with another.  There may be an exchange of  interest and care.  If the other doesn’t respond–instead of feeling rejected–I want to learn to love them.  If I l can still have a care for their well-being,  I won’t really have lost anything.   In fact, I will have gained.  Because every experience that causes me to want to have more love for others is an experience to value.

I know this is true, because it has happened often in the past.  I have learned so much from my experiences.  And I hope they are making me a batter person.  Won’t it be nice, when I get to the place where instead of feeling rejection or hurt, I feel love?

Because that is the wonderful thing about love.  Love doesn’t hurt.

 

Spam?

5 Mar

Today I was wondering what the definition of spam is.  I checked Wikipedia and it gave me the definition of the canned meat.  I had to smile.  That isn’t the definition that comes to most people’s mind in this day and age.  But fortunately Wikipedia has a link to click for electronic spam.  The main–short–definition seems to be unsolicited advertising.  Spamming is a free avenue of advertising that apparently anyone can use.  I was interested to learn that blogging spam is called ‘blam’.

Blam is the kind of spam I was thinking about as I started this post.  If you have read some of my past blogs, you will see that I encourage comments.  I’ve had some, and value them.  WordPress, whose site I use, has an engine that detects spam.  (Site is probably not the correct term but at the moment I can’t think what the correct term is, so I’m just using the word ‘site’.)   The spam is put into a folder on my dashboard.

Comments on my blog that WordPress doesn’t consider spam are put in another folder.  I receive email notice of these comments, so I can moderate them–approve or not.  Not receiving many comments, I rarely check my spam folder.  The messages are kept in the spam folder until (probably after a certain length of time) they are deleted from the site.  At least they disappear from the folder.

However when I receive email notice of a comment, I sometimes also  look in the spam folder.  That’s when I’m faced with a dilemma.  As I said before, I love comments.  And some of the comments in the spam folder seem like they could be real comments, even though sometimes when I click on the link it takes me to a website which obviously is advertising.  When I mentioned this to my son, he said “it is your site, you can display what you want on it”.  So perhaps I have approved some blam at times.  However, at least it seems to me, the only bad thing about this would be if my readers click on the comment and find only advertising and it irritates them.

Which brings me to question myself.  Am I so starved for feedback that I am approving blam?  If so, is that a bad thing?  I still haven’t come to a conclusion on this.  So, I’m requesting your feedback.  What do you consider spam/blam?    I’m hoping that I will get responses other than spamming and blamming.

Incidentally, my grandchildren love Spam.  They like it plain, on sandwiches or even fried.  And if I ask one of my granddaughters about spam /blam and blamming/spamming, I know her response would be “they rhyme”.

So please readers, do any of you like blam?   Besides you blammers and spammers?  Although I also have a question for the spammers and blammers.  Do you, somehow, get notification that I have approved your blam and because of this, you send me more–maybe sometimes even blamming/spamming under a different name?

Cosas me gustan de la vida urbana

4 Mar

Me gusta Jacksonville mucho.  Hay es mucho cosa para que hacer y ver.  En ‘meet-up’ busco para los groups que me gusta.  Es una manera de conocer gente y  encontar cosas que me gusta hacer.  Mis grupos son de los jardines, música, y español.   Algunos de los groupos reúnen el sábado  pero otras durante la semana.

Tqmbién me gusta que conducir por la ciudad.  Hay son muchas cosas ver.  Hay muchos parques hermosos.  Me gusta ver los edificios, especialmente en la área centro de la ciudad.  Me gusta ver la casa ancianidad, algunas largo pero otras son pequeña. Hay muchos restaurantes y es posible encontrar muchos diferentes comidas ėthnicas.  Hay todo typo de tiendas.  Hay grandes centros comerciales, pero me gustan las tiendas pequeñas mejores.  También la playa no estå lejos de la ciudad.  La playa y los ríos son muy hermoso.

Hay mucha cosa que quiero dibujar.  Asisto un clase dibujo y aprendo mucho.  Puedo publicar algunos de mis dibujos a este blog mås tarde.

Me gusta cominar en la playa, cerca los ríos y por la ciudad.  Es un buen ejercido y  hay tantas cosas que ver.  Donde vivo yo camino a la oficina postal, el mercado, el almacén de la droga, la biblioteca y varios restaurantes.

La vida enla ciudad es bueno para mi y lo disfruto.

A better afternoon

4 Mar

On my last post I told about my Sunday morning experience.  I’m happy to report that the afternoon went much better.  After I had finished writing the post, I felt revived enough to venture outside.  And so glad I did.  It was a lovely day, and I had a full tank of gas.  I headed north, up to the Home and Patio show.

Like I often do, I took the back roads.  Less traffic and usually much more scenic.  I drove past several beautiful parks where families were enjoying the nice weather.  I love getting glimpses of the river between some of the stately older homes. And, as I like to do when I’m not pressed for time, I took Ortega Rd.  It has an old bridge.  It’s a drawbridge actually, but you can’t tell it driving over, except there is a stop light above.  Well, this day the light before the bridge was flashing.  I got to see the bridge when it was up and watch the boat pass underneath!  There were arms that cross in front of the traffic like a railroad crossing. I had never noticed them before.  I noticed a couple who had been walking lean over watching the boat pass.  Then the bridge lowered, it seemed by increments.  It was such a neat experience.  Something to savor.

As I sat on the bridge, waiting, I was again struck by how beautiful the downtown skyline is–seen from that place.  This is the closest bridge to downtown that crosses the Ortega River. There are two parks, one on each side of the river.  You can see the larger St John’s River and then beyond the tall buildings downtown.  Sometimes they seem to be in a mist, but this time they were very clear against the blue sky.  Like always, I’m struck by a yearning to draw the scene.  So far I’ve always been going somewhere or coming back and haven’t taken time to stop very long.  One of these days I hope to go there just to draw.

Surprisingly there was not much traffic, even downtown.  It seemed most people had already arrived at the show.  The main parking lots were full but I was able to find parking several blocks further downtown.  And on such a nice day really I enjoyed the walk.

The show was huge.  I text my son=in-law to find where his booth was, but it still took quite awhile to find it.  Of course I did stop and look at stuff along the way.  One thing I purchased.  It’s a little shredder plate.  It is made of ceramic and has raised bumps.  You just rub whatever you want to grind over the bumps.  Viola!  It is ground and on it’s own little plate.  They had different colors, with different designs.  I chose this simple black one.  It has a little scroll that the picture doesn’t show very well..  Ceramic grinder mini plateIf  you want to put whatever you’ve just ground over your food or to add to a dish just use the little brush to sweep off what you want.  The blue cylinder is for removing the garlic peel.   In the demo I saw, they ground nutmeg, garlic, and cheese.

As I walked along, something else caught my eye.  One of my sons has a Robo vacuum.  Well, this wasn’t a vacuum, it’s a Robo lawn mower!  It goes around the yard on its own.  (I think your yard would have to be really smooth for it to work well.)  I text my son about it then continued walking along, looking at things.  I watched a few demos of juicers.  I would like to have one, but don’t want to spend the money.

After a couple of hours I found my son-in-law’s booth.  He said there had been a lot of people through.  By then I decided I had looked enough, so headed back outside.  I was hungry.  I haven’t been to a show like this for a few years, but I noticed a big difference in this one than the ones I used to go to.  I don’t know if it was due to this being a different part of the country or that money is tighter now or what, but the ones I used to go to had lots of vendors passing out food!  Here I only received a handful of very tiny samples.  Expecting the free food, I hadn’t brought extra cash.  Outside there were several food carts, but I had only a credit card.

I text my daughter and granddaughter to see if they wanted to eat somewhere.  It was then 2:30 and my granddaughter had already eaten.  My daughter was shopping in another area of the city.  I asked her where a good BBQ place was.  That’s what I had been smelling for most of my walk back to my car.  She said most of the downtown places aren’t open on Sunday.  But she told me of a drive-through place down on Hwy 17, just before the airbase, so I headed for it.

I found it and after a few U turns pulled into the parking lot, only to find that it–like the downtown restaurants–was closed.  In the same center area there was a Tiajana Flats and a Hurricane Wings, but I wasn’t really wanting either.  Then I saw the Tuptim Thai.  Thai is one of my favorite types of food.  So I went in.

It was now a quarter to 3 and the sign said they close at 3, so I barely made it.  I noticed a special of Mango rice and decided to have that.  A  minute or so after the waiter had taken my order, he came back and asked if I knew that dish was a dessert.  I hadn’t.  He said it is mango served with sticky rice.  I decided to have it anyway.   When it came, the look of the dish alone would have made my day.  I’ve seen the TV shows where they plate everything so pretty, but I’d never had it in real life.

Mango Sticky Rice       This pic doesn’t begin to do it justice.  It was so lovely, just to look at.  I had never seen a real, live orchid before.  In fact, I had to ask what kind of flower it was, just to be sure.  I also ask what the green leaf underneath was–banana leaf.  I had never had the sticky brown rice like that before either.  Both the rice and the mango was covered with a thin, white, subtly sweet sauce.  The whole thing was delicious!  I ate it all and told them I would come back sometime for lunch.

Then I headed on south, back to my apartment.  Funny thing though–although the dessert was delicious, I was still  hungry for BBQ!  So I decided to splurge.  Went to Sonny’s BBQ and got a pulled pork Carolina sandwich.  There may be other places better, as my daughter said when I told her, but this definitely hit the spot.  BBQ with slaw on top.  Of course I added some sweet and hot sauce to perfect it.

Well, even counting my crazy morning, this day was one I count as special.  It ended with me full and contented with a smile on my face.  It started out rocky, but later gave me unexpected pleasures.  My eyes had much to feast on.  The beauty of the drive.  I saw the drawbridge up.  I have my grinder plate.  I know I will smile every time I think of my dessert.  My younger son and I had often said we should order dessert first sometime–but I had never done it before.  Now I have, and know that it doesn’t  spoil your appetite to have dessert first.  A new learning experience for me.

And I brought my beautiful orchid home.  I’ve been trying to draw it.  First with colored pencils, then with just regular pencil.  I still want to perfect both drawings before I post them, but hope to get them online in the near future.  I also took a picture of the orchid, to have as a remembrance.  picture of Orchid from Mango Sticky Rice

The orchid is still beautiful now, a day later, though not quite as fresh looking.  I wonder how long it will last?  Not nearly as long as my memories of the better afternoon of a crazy morning.

It’s one of those mornings

2 Mar

I started to write this as a text message to my family, but it got too long.  I decided then to put it on Facebook, but it got long for that and I realized I could put it on my blog and link it to Facebook.  (That’s something I’ve learned to do fairly well,}  To save retyping and editing it again–as I just did when I changed from text to Facebook–I will just copy it and edit as little as possible.  Here is what I’ve written so far:

It seems to be one of those days.  It was hard to get up this morning but I wanted to go to my church meeting, so I made myself get up, after a 30 minute sleep-in.  I still had plenty of time and was having a leisurely breakfast when I got a call that church was north of here today, up near Callahan.  That”s quite a bit further away from where I usually go.  I appreciate that someone thought to let me know ahead of time, even though it was short notice.  Otherwise I would have driven there and wondered where everyone was.  Or thought I had my days mixed up.  Ha.  Or maybe that the rapture had come and I was left.  (That isn’t a good feeling.)

Anyway I quickly finished breakfast, found a travel mug for my coffee and was heading out the door when I remembered that I had to get gas.  I didn’t get it yesterday when I was out because the traffic was terrible.  It was a nice day and everybody seemed to be on the road.  Also, I thought I would have plenty of time this morning.

After getting gas, I looked at my watch and realized there was no way I could get there in time, so I headed back home.  Where, on the way into my apartment, I spilled coffee on myself.   My mug was open because I had intended to drink it (as I drove) I just hadn’t had time yet.

Now I’m sitting here in the apartment wondering what to do, arguing with myself.  Lol    I feel like going back to bed–but it is so nice out.   I have a headache–well I have had a bit of a hectic morning, haven’t had my coffee yet and…oh.. I haven’t taken my allergy pill yet.  At least I don’t think I have.  I remember noticing that my vitamin box needed refilling and I didn’t have time to fill it, but I would have to remember to take my allergy pill before I left.  (I usually take the allergy meds and the supplements at the same time, after breakfast, so I don’t forget to take them.)  So did I take the allergy pill or not?  IDK!!!  Better not to take it, I guess, than to double up.

Bed or change into something more comfy and go out.  Hmmm  Bed is winning.  Think I’ll get into something comfy, fix more coffee–hopefully to drink, not pour on self–then see.

I hope my afternoon will be better.  I had planned to go downtown to the Home and Patio show where my son-in-law has a booth.  But traffic will be bad.  Oh, oh, arguing with myself again.  Guess I better quit writing and get comfy.

—And that is what my ‘text’ has turned into.  You can see it is much too long for a text.  So glad I have this blog where I can write whatever I want, whenever–glad my son suggested blogging for me.  I still haven’t decided on the rest of my day, but as I sit here writing this,  in comfortable clothes, sipping my coffee, I realize at least I feel better.  Not wanting to go back to bed quite as much.  Maybe I will take my coffee out back for awhile and soak up the sun.  Or maybe I will get with my daughter later.  It can be a good day in spite of some setbacks.

 

 

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