After a long break

1 Oct

After a long breakI traveled all summer, during which time my raw food diet was on hold. I ate whatever was served, wherever I was. This seemed the simplest solution. I felt it best just to fit in. However after about three weeks I began to have bad stomach upsets. It didn’t even seem to matter what I ate. It took my daughter (who had offered to let me use her blender if I wanted to do raw) to offer a possible reason. Maybe, my stomach was rebelling at the non-raw diet! In my research of how to start a raw diet I’ve seen that too much, too quickly can cause an adverse reaction. I must have added raw food gradually enough that I didn’t notice any symptoms. But I definitely had the experience in reverse! Yet, even with this adverse reaction because it was more convienent. I continued to eat whatever and after about a week or so my stomach adjusted. It was certainly a learning experience,
Once I returned to Florida I was trying, again, to go raw. For some reason it doesn’t seem quite a easy as this spring. Maybe partly because I came back fairly exhausted and just didn’t feel like making the effort to restock and prepare. I have been looking at websites, getting ideas, planning menus, etc. This week I started making my morning blended drink. I appreciate the wake up, energizing feeling it gives me. And most days I have eaten a large salad for lunch.
Dinner, however, remains a problem. I often have activities during the afternoons, and come back tired and hungry. I quickly consumed all of the snack items leftover from my trip. I then usually opened a can of something and snarfed it. Or I munched on something in the fridge, only to be left feeling dissatisfied.
Last night as I turned onto my street I smelled the burgers at Wendy’s. I told myself it would be ok, just this once. The reception at the drive up was a little fuzzy and I ended up purchasing a double cheeseburger, small cheese burger and large unsweetened tea. Boy did that burger smell delicious, I could hardly wait to get into my apartment! Since I was so hungry I started with the double burger. It did taste good. But before I was even halfway through my stomach started feeling strange. I told my self–no way–it has to be just my imagination. It couldn’t have an effect that quick. I continued to eat, finishing the large burger and starting on the small one. But after a few bites, into the fridge it went-along with the tea.
By then I wasn’t feeling too bad, just a little burping, and after a bit went to bed. I often wake up at night, so it wasn’t unusual when I awoke at 2am. But the way I felt wasn’t usual. In vain I tried to find my tums. (Did I mention I am not completely unpacked from my trip yet?) Instead I turned to the old remedy of baking soda in water. It did the trick, along with leaving me thirsty. Lol
My smoothie this morning really hit the spot. Yet now at lunchtime I am, again, feeling upset. I don’t even want to think of that half of sandwich in the fridge. It will probably become cat food to one of the strays around here. I’m thinking I will have only the tea for lunch. Perhaps not the healthiest–but my grandma always gave me burnt toast with tea for upset stomach. I’m just omitting the burnt toast!

Raw Food Update

7 Apr

Although I am certainly not 100% raw, I have been adding LOTS more raw food to my diet.  However there have been some challenges.  Since I like variety–in my food as well as in most everything else–I have been searching the web for raw recipes.  There are tons of them!  But many take quite a bit of time to create or use equipment which I don’t have and presently have no room to store.  And unfortunately I have become somewhat spoiled by the abundant availability in this area of resturants where I can quickly get a little something that satisfies my taste buds for the moment.

I have tried a few recipes, with varying degrees of success.  I do ok for breakfast.  Often I will blend up a mix of greens, fruits, and veggies and nuts.  Sometimes I add sprouted grain that I have on hand.  I can’t really call these smoothies (they are more like a thick drink) becuase I am only using my Osterizer blender which I’ve had for several years.   The only other equipment I have is a tiny food processor which does about a cup at a time.  It works for me becuase that way I can eat what I fix in one setting.

Another breakfast I make with my little processor is grated soaked almonds, apples and a slice of ginger root.  Very fresh and filling!  Since I am still trying to use up the un-raw food I have on hand, I have added Grape Nuts cereal to the apple/almond breakfast.   Sometimes I made a wonderful mango pudding, adding a little coconut,  bananas and ginger root.

One of the reasons I have been frequenting restaurants is because I still haven’t broke myself of the habit of buying too much produce at one time.  Some of the raw sites even say to purchase lots of food so you always have something on hand whe a craving strikes.  But this hasn’t worked for me.  I will buy food items thinking I will make some recipe, only when the time comes I either don’t want to take the time to fix it or I’m not in the mood for that food.  Then before I know it, the food has spoiled.  And I am again berating myself for wasting food and money.  Other times I will sprout beans, greens, and grains, but leave them too long before using and they get tough.

At times, I will buy food that I have rarely if ever used–like mangos.  The first ones I purchased were the large kind which seemed to have an aftertaste.  I added them to my morning drink.  But then I discovered the smaller mangos and found they were wonderful.  That is also case with the fresh coconut.  Once I finally got it opened, I found several uses for it.  I ate some fresh and cut the rest up in pieces and stuck in the freezer.  I do this with my ginger and turmeric too.  It makes it so easy to slice off a bit and add to a dish.  So, yes, there have been some successes.

Someone at my last Raw Food Potluck had fixed a great cauliflower recipe.  Although I had never been a big cauliflower fan, I purchased one at my last grocery visit.  And it has set in the refrigerator for nearly a week.  But today I decided I am going to use it.   So I searched for raw cauliflower recipes.  Some where it is chopped into a rice like size and used like rice as a base for sauces.  Other recipes for different salads.  I finally found one on titled Raw Cauliflower Korma.  I’m not sure  what Korma means but I liked the list of ingredients.  I’ve been frequenting Indian resturants lately and this recipe seemed to fit right in.

Yes, the recipe sounded good.  The fact that I didn’t have some of the ingredients didn’t stop me.  I hardly ever follow a recipe exactly!  So I went about substituting and mixed up a spice mixture that apealed to me using sumac seasoning, dried mint, dried thyme, coriander seeds, cinnamon, and galangal.  It seemed to need a little more sweetness so added some crystallized ginger.  I used 4-5 cauliflowerettes, about a half cup of carrots, some tamarind paste, two dates–hey I followed the recipe on the dates– a clove of garlic, two green onions.  Oh, tomatoes–no sun dried tomatoes in cupboard.  But I did find a can of garlic herb pasta sauce and a can of tomato soup.  After considering I decided on the tomato soup.  For liquid I used the water from soaking the nuts. Directions always say to discard tries water, but I’ve developed a taste for it.  It tastes a little like the fermented drink rejevenic made from spouted grain.  Anyway, I added that.   And today I created enough (nearly raw) tasty Cauliflower Gaspacho for two meals!  Probably in the time it would have taken to drive to a restaurant.  Plus saving money, I know what all the ingredients are and know it is fresh!  And, hopefully, since the cauliflower didn’t really taste like cauliflower, I will be able to find other recipes that I like and make them before the rest the head spoils.

Another success was the dish I made for the Raw Food Potluck.   I call it Butternut Slaw. Raw grated butternut squash, fresh squeezed orange juice, ginger and turmeric root.  I let the flavors blend overnight.   The recipe, which I changed completely, called for cranberries.  But I liked the flavors of the slaw just as it was.  So I made a relish side dish with cranberries, apples, oranges, olive oil, rice vinegar, a bit of stevia and some of my espresso vinegar.  Both were a hit and the slaw especially was so pretty and fresh looking!

Butternut Slaw with Cranberry Relish

Butternut Slaw with Cranberry Relish



New Spiritual Journey

29 Mar

I never used to understand that Bible verse about ‘work out your own salvation with fear and trembling’, Phil 2:12.  But in the past few years I have been realizing it is a very real search/journey.  I have had a lot of soul searching and done lots of Bible studies on various topics. Experiences in my life have convinced me, beyond a doubt that God is leading me closer to Him.  And, trembling sometimes, I am trying to follow.

For several months I’ve been feeling like God is calling me to something ‘more’.  I have felt such a need to praise and worship God.  And my church meetings haven’t fullfilled that need.  Yet I’ve kept trying to go.  Sometimes it was a good experience and sometimes not.  I love the sharing part of the meeting.  Yet I know there are parts of the (tradition?, beliefs?) that I don’t believe.  Parts I now realize I never have believed.  But still I tried to keep going, feeling like I had been part of the problem so I should be part of the fix.  Then I wondered “who am I to try to fix something?”  And I kept getting these pricks–“Follow Me, I have more for you”.  And, “why aren’t you listening to me?”  Finally that verse came to where Jesus says to Saul/Paul–it is hard for you to kick against the pricks, Acts 26-14, and I realized I need to listen and take heed.  It’s a scary thing to leave something you have grown up mostly beleiving.  Yet it is a whole lot scarier not to follow where I know is God/Jesus leading me!

I visited with a woman from my Quest group (we are on a quest to learn more about ourselves, each other and God) and she invited me to her church for a presentation.  I liked parts of it.  I was invited to a women’s bible study there, but haven’t gone yet. She believes in Once Saved, Always Saved.  And my church certainly doesn’t!

Since I feel God is leading me away from my church, I decided to visit area churches, because I do want to meet with believers.  I want to praise God–to sing and well, really to shout–of His wonderful encompassing essence!

I went to a local church last Sunday.  I liked it, but wanted to check out others.  I found another nearby that sounded interesting.  I was planning to go this morning but they are having pre Easter Kids service and egg hunt today and I wasn’t interested in that.  I also want to check out a couple up in JAX.  I found one up in the city that sounded really interesting, but since it seemed to be in a questionable neighborhood I drove up there first and decided–maybe not.  I am also signed up for a bible study in my Quest group led by the woman whose church presentation I went to.

But today, since it was too late to go back to the place I we last week, I didn’t go anywhere.  Instead I’ve been researching online opposing views on ‘Once Saved, Always Saved’ doctrine.  I read a Lutheran link that had a lot of helpful scripture (which I took notes from) and views, at least until I clicked on their doctrine.  Some of which I believe is NOT scriptural.  So then looked at other sites.  I’ve taken notes of some links and quotes.  I especially like the one about our enemy being Satan–not believers who have differing view.  Because that is one thing I have Always hated about Meetings (what I’m calling the way/church I have been in since a teenager).  I have always cringed inside when I heard the criticism of other religions, especially when I could hear the contempt in the voice.  Yet there have been times in the past, when I too, felt like I had something that others didn’t.  I hate that.  It only brings self-righteousness.  It causes a terrible feeling inside, something I never want to feel again!  A certain pity for others, but no joy to self or to others.

Back to my research.  I will probably come back to it many times, but for today after browsing through my notes, I find the best concept is that both views are correct.  Even though they seem to be opposing.  Yes, there can be a falling away, but also we can believe God’s promise that ‘nothing can separate us from His love’.  Although I didn’t note it specifically in my notes, I believe this was taken from the Lutheran site. (I will try to find the link if any are interested.).  The ‘falling away’ was spoken to the ‘Old Man’–our flesh–who wants nothing to do with God.  Whereas God’s promise is to the ‘New Man’–who believes in Christ.  When we believe that Christ died for us to become righteous before God, and that through grace by Jesus Christ and for His sake we are ‘saved’–righteousness and eternal life are given to us!

One site mentioned that the word Believe in the Greek translation is an ongoing verb.  We must continually repent of our sin and believe in Christ saving power.  The Christian life is one of continual repentance; true repentance and turning away from sin brings about a changed behavior which is pleasing to God.  This brings up another opposing subject: faith vs works.  That Is a study I started over three years ago, which I continually return to.  Maybe I will post on that another time.

Another study I may do is what is referred to as ‘the Great Commission’.  I think most churches preach that all believers need to spread the Gospel, whereas my church seems to feel that it should only be the ministers.

As a result it has always been hard for me to speak to to others of God.  However, now God is leading me in this.  Just the very day after I had finally said (in my heart), “Ok God, I will go where you are leading”, an experience came where I could share something that, previously, I would have never mentioned.  A coincidence?  I think not.  And even in this post I am sharing, with trembling jubulation, where God is leading me. Praise be to HIM!


2014 in review

29 Jan

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 780 times in 2014. If it were a cable car, it would take about 13 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

Raw diet?

16 Oct

I’ve been on many different food kicks in my life.  Enjoying the novelty of new ways of eating.  Wholeheartedly getting into each one, only to eventually lose interest or slip back into more regular, normal eating patterns.  Although my kids and friends would probably tell you that there is really very little “normal” about my eating habits–nor anything else about me, for that matter.  Strangely enough that doesn’t hurt my feeling.  It did, a little, in the past.  But I think I have finally arrived at the place where I know what/who I am and am satisfied with it.  Not that I don’t want to get better, cause I do.  But it’s pretty amazing to find that I like myself!

Back to diet.  I feel like I need an extra boost of energy this fall.  I remember when I was first on the diet to lower my thyroid.  It was hard to stay on.  Indeed at the first slip I was off and couldn’t seem to get back.  And since my thyroid was better by that time, I must admit I didn’t try very hard.  But I remember, and hope I never forget, how I could actually feel my body bogging down.

And now, when I feel I need a boost I am turning to not just adding more fruits and veggie to my diet, but more raw ones.  I have been interested in raw diet at different times in my life, but never gone completely raw.  I doubt that I will this time either, but I guess , with me, anything is possible.

At some of the meet-up groups I attend, there are people who are really into vegan, vegetarian, and I believe a few into raw.  There are even a couple of raw meetups.  But I have enough meet-up groups at present.  So I’m doing this on my own, as usual.  This week I have visited countless websites and You tube videos.   (I will list the sites on a later post).   I’ve bookmarked a lot of them.   I’ve looked at raw recipes–so many look so good.  I’ve checked into the different ways to start on raw foods.  I’ve even made up a grocery list.  Then, last night I stumbled on a site that recommended to just eat simple.  Eat whatever fruits and veggies I want, eat as much as I want.  Enjoy what I eat, truly savor it.   I like that idea.  

That’s when I realized I don’t have to embrace the whole raw food idea (even if that is how I have often worked in the past).   I can just eat what my body seems to need and what I want.  I had to smile at that.  Because even this week, when I was searching out all the raw food info, I have also been experimenting with soy milk and soy burgers–certainly not raw, but at least vegetarian.   That’s not saying I will go all veg, though.  I love a good steak occasionally.  Just last night I cooked the last one in the freezer.  But, surprisingly, I found it didn’t satisfy me quite as much as I had expected.  I found I only wanted about a third of it.  I guess my body is trying to tell me something.  I really need/want to learn to listen to it more.

Even though the idea of a raw food diet still intrigues me, I’m going to try to go about it differently.  To not just jump in and immerse myself, then later, perhaps, lose interest.  Instead, I’m going to take it slow.  To enjoy the tastes of the fruits and veggies.  Not to limit myself.  To keep experimenting with other, cooked foods, if I want.  But to add more fresh, raw foods to my diet.  Which is what the dietary experts tell us is best, anyway.  I want to see where it will lead me.  Because, I realize that in food, as well as every area of my life, its really the journey that I enjoy.  Really, that’s what this life is about–a journey.  As I write this, I realize that is also true in a spiritual sense.  But I will write about that another time.  This post is about food.  (I have to keep telling myself that, or I know I would go off on another tangent.)

I was thinking that my raw diet journey will start as soon as I go to the grocery store, but I realize it has already started.  I’m already a good way into the research.  I am learning now, even though not yet sampling.  Perhaps, that will be all the journey is–just learning.  Just learning–that sounds like I’m devaluating the learning process/journey.  I don’t want to do that.  Everything I learn is important.  Even when I’m learning what doesn’t work for me.

So, Raw Diet. I’m on my way.



Keeping interested in my various interests

4 Aug

If you’ve read many of my past posts, you know that I have many different interests.  Some come and go, some continue to be somewhat constant and others resurface later, sometimes years later.  Sometimes I get too many things going on at once and find I need to back off a little.

But this present year, though am doing many new and different things, I’ve been congratulating myself on keeping up so well.  But checking on my blog today, I feel that may have been a bit premature,  I have been so busy traveling and pursuing new interests that I see I have missed replying to several comments on my blog.

So if you have left a comment and I didn’t respond,  please forgive me.  I love to hear from readers.  Also, at the rate I’ve been going, don’t be surprised if you receive a reply on a comment you made some time ago.

This summer I have traveled.  I’ve been through Missouri, out to Nebraska, back to Missouri and amazingly then on to Hawaii!  (Courtesy of credit card points that have piled up for years.). I am presently in Missouri, but will be returning to Florida soon.   I’ve had some wonderful times.  Seen beautiful things and in every trip was able to visit friends and relatives I haven’t seen for some time.  So it has been a rich experience for me.

Needless to say, some things had to be put aside for awhile.  Several of my activities were stopped for he duration of my traveling,  others, such as my art and this blog have only been touched on.  Although for both of these interest–even though I haven’t been doing much, I have been thinking of them..  So many times I’ve seen something only to think–I want to draw that.  Or–hey, I can use that in my blog.  But most of the time they have only been thoughts.  Sometimes I was able to snap a pic to help me remember, but a lot of times we were already passed it.  Some of the things I noticed were little, insignificant things.  Such as the reflection of water, clouds, the patterns of shadows, or seeing people and thinking of writing of the culture in the different areas.

In addition to all the new sites, there is the pleasure of seeing what I hope will be all of my grand kids this summer.  That hasn’t happened for several year.

As I said, the summer has been wonderful,  And now, when it am almost done traveling, I find myself looking forward to return to Florida and all the activities and interests and new friends I have there.  Last week I had a long lunch with a friend.  She said  that she could tell I loved variety,  not everyone does.  We agreed that is probably one reason why I like the Jacksonville area so well–there is so much to do and new things to see.

Only, after being on the go all summer I am wondering if I might want to slow down a little when I return   At least for awhile.  As I think of  this late summer and fall, I realize even if I take a break from some of my more active interests, there are plenty of easy going interests to fall back on.  I’m thinking of taking some of my yarn stash back with me.  I may get in the mood to knit….  Whatever I decide to do, at least I know I won’t be bored!  That’s a great benefit of  being interested in many interests.

I have to admit

21 May

Yes, sadly, I have to admit that I have fallen into a little slump lately. Things have seemed, just–well, just a little blah. I’m not really down, but just feel a little off, somehow. I don’t have quite the energy and enthusiasm of the past several month.

Contemplating this, I wonder about the cause. Is it (horrible thought) that the “new” is wearing off of my new living experience? Or is it, that knowing I will soon be leaving for at least several months, makes me think of all that I will miss while I’m gone? Or. Is it something else?

Could it be that again, as too often in the past, I have begun to think about what I don’t have?  The top on THAT list, would be a significant other. No one to share my days and nights with. No one to listen to all my thoughts and feelings, No one with which to share the enjoyment of life with. I suppose the list could go on and on.

So, which is the cause? Probably a combination of all of the above. I know it is sometimes difficult for me to sustain interest in activities. I seem to be attracted to the new. Yet, I truly enjoy all my activities down here, and I do realize that life just doesn’t always offer new opportunities. But, now as I’m writing this, I realize that I have several new things planned for the months ahead.

Ok, say the new hasn’t worn off yet. Why am I not able to joyfully embrace the new activities in the next several months? The activities I enjoy here will still be here when I return. I may even find deeper enjoyment in them after being gone for awhile.

Which leaves me to the dreaded conclusion. I’ve been having a pity party! Not a full blown one–thankfully I’ve recognized it before it reached that stage. The possibility that this might be the cause of my slump came to me this morning, in a very simple incident.

I had walked down to the Dollar store for a few items. It was still nice and cool and as I smiled when I met people and spoke to a few, I realized how much I was enjoying the moment. I also notified that others seemed to return the smile. And I realized, how often I forget to enjoy the simple things, and how those brief moments can brighten our day so much. When I get so caught up in my own feelings and thoughts, I miss many pleasures of life. I also miss giving a taste of those little pleasures to others. I remember in one of my earlier posts I wrote about how I can brighten another’s day.

Even, now, as I think of the that day at the store, my heart swells. There is so much in this life that brings enjoyment, so many simple pleasures that can enrich my life. Why do I let myself get so bogged down at times? I really don’t know. But I do know, and am very glad that I don’t have to stay down. That is my choice.

I want to learn how to think each day of finding something to savor and then share it with others, if possible. I want to look more for the beauty of life and when I find it, I want to take the time to appreciate it.

PS:  I wrote this post some time ago, then got busy and didn’t post it.  Today, as I read over what I wrote a few months ago, I realize I have learned something else about myself.

As I was reading, I wondered–why do I let myself get–well, I guess I get bogged down in myself? Although I don’t really to admit it, maybe it’s just a part of who I am. I’m usually an upbeat person–but not always. But, really isn’t that that’s ok? Because I’m certainly NOT super woman. I will have my down times, just like everyone else. At least, now, I am becoming more aware of my feelings and ways to pull myself out of the dumps.

Perhaps the most important thing for me, is just to admit where I’m at–what the condition of my thinking and feeling is at the moment. Then, if I find it isn’t where I want to be, I can find ways to change–to become what I want to be. For I am a person, ever changing, learning, and hopefully improving.

All I can do is laugh

1 May

Last week my laptop did a really strange thing.  I was using it when the screen went black and startled me with a loud continuous buzzing.  I tried pushing the Alt/Control/Del with no success.  Then I unplugged it and continued pushing buttons.  Suddenly, the noise quit and the computer turned off.  I was really afraid that is was fried!

I decided to leave it for awhile.  Later, fearing that I might not be able to get in, I turned it on.  Surprise!  It booted up as usual.  I couldn’t see anything wrong, so continued what I had been doing when it crashed.  I then went to YouTube to look up something, only to find that their was no sound!  I checked the Control Panel/sound, and it showed the same volume I have always had.  So, of course, I thought that whatever the crashing problem was, it had taken out my sound.

I wasn’t happy about that, but decided I could live with it.  (I’ve been shopping for a replacement iPad, and certainly didn’t want to get another laptop too.)  After a few days I was on practicing my Spanish on and realized the sound was working!  I really didn’t understand how it could have fixed itself, but I wasn’t going to complain.  However, when I tried YouTube again later, it still wasn’t working.  Rats!

Well, those of you who are more computer savvy than I, are probably shaking your heads!  But although I was perplexed I still couldn’t figure it out.  Okay, besides shaking your head you are probably thinking ‘that poor woman’.  But if you think that is bad, just read on.

Yesterday I had been online comparing prices and models of i Pads.  I had also been looking at houses for sale.  There were papers all around me where I had jotted down prices and addresses.  I was using my laptop to search the sites, and my iPad to find the address.  My phone was also nearby in case I wanted to compare two different sites.   In the midst of all this my brother called.

I am always happy to talk to him, but unfortunately right then part of my mind was still half on what I’d been doing.  So I was gathering up the papers, sorting them into piles, turning off the laptop and iPad when suddenly I wondered where my phone was.  I knew it had been right there!  I remembered laying it on the arm of the couch. I searched down in the cushions, but couldn’t find it.  I was beginning to panic—I must have my phone.  Then (I guess I must have been a little of topic??) and my brother ask if I was busy.  I started to tell him, I couldn’t find my ph…..Oh Wait!…..HOW STUPID CAN I GET!!!!!!

I burst out laughing.  I told him what a stupid, stupid sister he had.  I also told him the next time when he can’t find something–we both are convinced it must be an age thing–to just remember, he isn’t as bad as his younger sister!  We agreed that, even though we do things that are really crazy sometimes, it is good we can laugh about it.  Sometimes that’s ALL we can do.  Laugh and shake our heads.  That’s so much better than getting mad, which would only  upset us more.  Maybe this silliness is due old age, maybe it’s too much multi-tasking, maybe just not paying attention to detail.  Whatever the cause, it is just something we seem to have to live with.  So if laughing helps us handle it, great!

Oh, and just a few minutes ago I figured out why the sound on YouTube hasn’t been working.  I usually use my iPad for YouTube.  It has a slider tab for the sound.  But my laptop doesn’t.  However, it does have–I found–a little icon for sound.  I selected it, and wonder of wonders I again have sound!  In turning it off and on (just checking) I realized there is a little ‘x’ beside the icon when the sound is off.  I don’t know when I pushed it off.  Perhaps when I was using the pause, since the icons are side-by-side.  Whenever it was, I only noticed it after my laptop had frozen.  Such a simple thing, don’t know why I never noticed that icon before.

Even as I continue to laugh and shake my head when I think of these experiences, I realize that at least I have learned something today.  I am a tiny bit more computer savvy than before.  I still don’t know why my laptop crashed that day, but since it is working now I’m not going to fret about it.

I was going to text this to the daughter I had told about my sound problem, but decided to post it here instead.   My silliness is still making me smile, so it might bring a smile or laugh to others.  If so maybe it’s worth it.  In fact, maybe it’s even worth it to me.  I probably needed a good laugh too .


Love doesn’t hurt

31 Mar

I just read a  Facebook post that says it isn’t true that love hurts.  What hurts is rejection, loss, loneliness and envy.   The post said that everyone gets these things confused with love.  But in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all the pain and makes someone feel wonderful again.

This is so true. And we all need love so much!  I started to write a comment, then decided to put my comment on this blog.

We all feel painful emotions at times.  That’s just a part of life.   It’s wonderful when we have special someones that love us and make us feel better.  But what about those of us living alone, without someone special.  We need love too.

Sometimes I get to wondering why I’m even around, do I really make a difference in anyone’s life?  Then I’m reminded that I don’t always have to be on the receiving end of love.  I can be the one to give it.

Thinking about this, I realized that it really doesn’t have to be someone special that I love or show love to. I can extend that marvelous emotion with everyone. Love, in its simplest form, is just caring about someone.

Take the woman I met in the mall parking lot the other day.  She had long brown hair, extending past her waist.  After smiling and saying Hi, I told her how much I liked her hair.  She said “Well, thanks.  I really need someone to like something about me today.”    We spoke a few minutes.  I told her about the French Twist hairstyle my daughter and I had recently seen.  Then we parted, each going our separate ways.

I don’t know who that woman was and I’ll probably never see her again.  I don’t know what problems she is facing, or why she needed encouragement. The only thing I know, is that I’m glad I reached out to her.  Such a little thing, maybe 3 minutes.  Yet, I think it lightened her load.   Maybe her day became better, at least for a few moments.

It also did something to me.  I’ve been thinking of her often since that day.  I’ve prayed for her, asking for help for her to face the things she is going through.  This has brought me out of myself.  It has made me aware that I shouldn’t be waiting for someone to love me–I should be loving others.

Because it’s true.  Love doesn’t hurt.  Love heals.  Care heals.  Just the smallest concern for someone helps.  And love is a two-way street.  Every time I reach out to someone, something comes back to me.  (This can happen in a bad way, too.)  So I want to be careful that I’m reaching out to others with care, concern, interest and love.

This is easier to extend to some people, than to others.  Some just seem to rub us the wrong way.  Maybe the best way I can love those is to stay away from them, and pray for help–not just for them (cause, after all they are the one that needs help, right?)–but for myself  to understand how to love them.  As I think of that, I believe love needs to start at the basic bottom level.

If I can have a concern–a desire for the well being–of those who I really don’t care for, then that is the start of love.  If I truly feel that I don’t want them to be lonely, rejected, and suffer loss–then I am on my way to loving them.  As the Bible says–Love works no ill to our neighbor.

Does this mean that I’m going to strike up a conversation with everyone I see?  Of course not.  I don’t even have eye contact with some people.  With some I may share a smile, or extend a short greeting.

But sometimes, I will reach out with a brief comment.  And for a few moments I may connect with another.  There may be an exchange of  interest and care.  If the other doesn’t respond–instead of feeling rejected–I want to learn to love them.  If I l can still have a care for their well-being,  I won’t really have lost anything.   In fact, I will have gained.  Because every experience that causes me to want to have more love for others is an experience to value.

I know this is true, because it has happened often in the past.  I have learned so much from my experiences.  And I hope they are making me a batter person.  Won’t it be nice, when I get to the place where instead of feeling rejection or hurt, I feel love?

Because that is the wonderful thing about love.  Love doesn’t hurt.



5 Mar

Today I was wondering what the definition of spam is.  I checked Wikipedia and it gave me the definition of the canned meat.  I had to smile.  That isn’t the definition that comes to most people’s mind in this day and age.  But fortunately Wikipedia has a link to click for electronic spam.  The main–short–definition seems to be unsolicited advertising.  Spamming is a free avenue of advertising that apparently anyone can use.  I was interested to learn that blogging spam is called ‘blam’.

Blam is the kind of spam I was thinking about as I started this post.  If you have read some of my past blogs, you will see that I encourage comments.  I’ve had some, and value them.  WordPress, whose site I use, has an engine that detects spam.  (Site is probably not the correct term but at the moment I can’t think what the correct term is, so I’m just using the word ‘site’.)   The spam is put into a folder on my dashboard.

Comments on my blog that WordPress doesn’t consider spam are put in another folder.  I receive email notice of these comments, so I can moderate them–approve or not.  Not receiving many comments, I rarely check my spam folder.  The messages are kept in the spam folder until (probably after a certain length of time) they are deleted from the site.  At least they disappear from the folder.

However when I receive email notice of a comment, I sometimes also  look in the spam folder.  That’s when I’m faced with a dilemma.  As I said before, I love comments.  And some of the comments in the spam folder seem like they could be real comments, even though sometimes when I click on the link it takes me to a website which obviously is advertising.  When I mentioned this to my son, he said “it is your site, you can display what you want on it”.  So perhaps I have approved some blam at times.  However, at least it seems to me, the only bad thing about this would be if my readers click on the comment and find only advertising and it irritates them.

Which brings me to question myself.  Am I so starved for feedback that I am approving blam?  If so, is that a bad thing?  I still haven’t come to a conclusion on this.  So, I’m requesting your feedback.  What do you consider spam/blam?    I’m hoping that I will get responses other than spamming and blamming.

Incidentally, my grandchildren love Spam.  They like it plain, on sandwiches or even fried.  And if I ask one of my granddaughters about spam /blam and blamming/spamming, I know her response would be “they rhyme”.

So please readers, do any of you like blam?   Besides you blammers and spammers?  Although I also have a question for the spammers and blammers.  Do you, somehow, get notification that I have approved your blam and because of this, you send me more–maybe sometimes even blamming/spamming under a different name?

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