I just read a Facebook post that says it isn’t true that love hurts. What hurts is rejection, loss, loneliness and envy. The post said that everyone gets these things confused with love. But in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all the pain and makes someone feel wonderful again.
This is so true. And we all need love so much! I started to write a comment, then decided to put my comment on this blog.
We all feel painful emotions at times. That’s just a part of life. It’s wonderful when we have special someones that love us and make us feel better. But what about those of us living alone, without someone special. We need love too.
Sometimes I get to wondering why I’m even around, do I really make a difference in anyone’s life? Then I’m reminded that I don’t always have to be on the receiving end of love. I can be the one to give it.
Thinking about this, I realized that it really doesn’t have to be someone special that I love or show love to. I can extend that marvelous emotion with everyone. Love, in its simplest form, is just caring about someone.
Take the woman I met in the mall parking lot the other day. She had long brown hair, extending past her waist. After smiling and saying Hi, I told her how much I liked her hair. She said “Well, thanks. I really need someone to like something about me today.” We spoke a few minutes. I told her about the French Twist hairstyle my daughter and I had recently seen. Then we parted, each going our separate ways.
I don’t know who that woman was and I’ll probably never see her again. I don’t know what problems she is facing, or why she needed encouragement. The only thing I know, is that I’m glad I reached out to her. Such a little thing, maybe 3 minutes. Yet, I think it lightened her load. Maybe her day became better, at least for a few moments.
It also did something to me. I’ve been thinking of her often since that day. I’ve prayed for her, asking for help for her to face the things she is going through. This has brought me out of myself. It has made me aware that I shouldn’t be waiting for someone to love me–I should be loving others.
Because it’s true. Love doesn’t hurt. Love heals. Care heals. Just the smallest concern for someone helps. And love is a two-way street. Every time I reach out to someone, something comes back to me. (This can happen in a bad way, too.) So I want to be careful that I’m reaching out to others with care, concern, interest and love.
This is easier to extend to some people, than to others. Some just seem to rub us the wrong way. Maybe the best way I can love those is to stay away from them, and pray for help–not just for them (cause, after all they are the one that needs help, right?)–but for myself to understand how to love them. As I think of that, I believe love needs to start at the basic bottom level.
If I can have a concern–a desire for the well being–of those who I really don’t care for, then that is the start of love. If I truly feel that I don’t want them to be lonely, rejected, and suffer loss–then I am on my way to loving them. As the Bible says–Love works no ill to our neighbor.
Does this mean that I’m going to strike up a conversation with everyone I see? Of course not. I don’t even have eye contact with some people. With some I may share a smile, or extend a short greeting.
But sometimes, I will reach out with a brief comment. And for a few moments I may connect with another. There may be an exchange of interest and care. If the other doesn’t respond–instead of feeling rejected–I want to learn to love them. If I l can still have a care for their well-being, I won’t really have lost anything. In fact, I will have gained. Because every experience that causes me to want to have more love for others is an experience to value.
I know this is true, because it has happened often in the past. I have learned so much from my experiences. And I hope they are making me a batter person. Won’t it be nice, when I get to the place where instead of feeling rejection or hurt, I feel love?
Because that is the wonderful thing about love. Love doesn’t hurt.